Minerva's Mirror
by mugglemin
Summary: Minerva has a morning conversation with her mirror. No longer a one-shot...WIP
1. Default Chapter

**Minerva's mirror.**

**A morning conversation with her mirror as Minerva puts her hair up. The mirror idea was pinched from a scene from a Griselda Le Fay Fic. Another element of this story was inspired by the book "The Girl with a Pearl Earring". And of course the rest comes from J.K Rowling. Not a single original point from me…sigh.**

(The mirror sighs.)

"Not that old hair do _again_!"

"Yes, this one again."

"You don't fancy a change at all?"

"Nope."

"What about a French twist? I mean, that's not _so _different to a bun…"

"No."

"A plait, then?"

"No. I wear it to bed in a plait."

"Well how about loosening the bun a bit?"

"No. I like it just the way it is, thank you very much."

"But it would soften your face…"

"I don't want to soften my face. The students would think _I _had gone soft."

"But it makes you look so _severe_!"

"Exactly."

(A moment of silence as Minerva adds the last few pins to her bun.)

"Why don't you wear it down? Not during school hours, but after perhaps…"

"You know perfectly well why I never wear my hair down."

"Yes, yes, I know. It makes you feel…aroused."

"Quite. Hardly appropriate, in the circumstances."

"What if that headmaster chap asked you to wear it down?"

"He wouldn't be so forward. And besides, why would he care how I wear my hair?"

"He's very fond of you, you know?"

"What's that got to do with my hair?"

"Everything. Bet he'd like to see you with it down."

(Minerva bites her lip, but continues patting her hair in place, as if reluctant to move away from the mirror.)

"He has never given me any hint that he would like to see me with my hair down."

"But he would, you know. Especially when he knew what would happen if he pulled the pins himse…"

(Door slams as Minerva exits for breakfast.)

**Just a quickie. Not sure wether to continue it or not...I do have an idea, but think it works okay as a one shot. Pls. review and let me know what you think.**


	2. Chapter 2

Minerva's mirror: Chapter 2

(Albus Dumbledore combs his beard in front of his bedroom mirror. He hums a tune, and the mirror hums along with him).

"You're looking very dashing today, Headmaster!"

"You think so?"

"Oh yes indeed! Your beard has an extra shine to it, and your hair is as silver as a full moon."

(Albus chuckles).

"That'll be the new shampoo Minerva bought for me."

"Oh, congratulations sir! How old are we now?"

"I beg your pardon?"

"Surely if you are receiving presents, there must have been an occasion! It's not Christmas is it?"

"No, it is not Christmas just yet. Neither was it my birthday. I merely remarked to Minerva the other morning that I needed some new shampoo, and she recommended hers. Said it was marvellous, and went out that afternoon and bought me a bottle."

"Very kind of her!"

"Absolutely. And it _is _marvellous, although I wouldn't have known it from looking at Minerva's hair. Can't see a strand with it up in that bun everyday…"

"You mean, you've never actually seen her with her hair down, and yet you trusted her choice in shampoo?!"

"I trust Minerva in all things."

"Headmaster Dumbledore! Have I taught you _nothing _about hair-care in all these years?"

(Mirror is irate)

"No, you've been very informative."

"Then surely, sir, you should know never to take advice on hair care products without actually seeing the hair of the advisor?! What if she never takes her hair down because it's got no sheen? What if she suffers from split-ends? _Dandruff_!! How could you be sure that the shampoo was right for you?!"

"Well, it clearly is, for as you said earlier, there is an extra shine to my hair this morning…"

"But you didn't know that! Really sir, you must be more careful. If this shampoo is so good, why does the lady never wear her hair down? Why must she hide it in this tight bun you speak of? What if the long term effects of this shampoo are damaging?"

(Albus looks puzzled)

"I very much doubt that Minerva would recommend something to me that might cause damage…"

"But you can't be sure sir!"

"Yes I can."

"No you can't, sir!"

"I can too! I've know her for a very long time. She is a woman of strict principle and would never wittingly recommend something harmful to anyone, least of all a friend - a category to which I flatter myself that I belong."

(Mirror eyes him suspiciously)

"Well you might be certain sir, but I am not. And as it is my duty as your mirror to take care of your physical appearance, I believe that I am within my rights to demand proof that this lady's hair is of a high standard."

"What nonsense! How can I give you proof? You live in my bedroom, and she has no occasion to ever come in here!"

"Well, sir, I suggest that you bring her here and request that she confirms that the shampoo she uses and recommend is of good quality."

(Albus smiles to himself)

"You want me to ask Minerva McGonagall to come up here to my bedroom and take her hair down to prove that it is as shiny and silken as my own is today?"

"Yes."

(Albus is quiet for some time. Eventually, he clears his throat.)

"Alright."

(Door closes as Albus exit's the bedroom.)


	3. Chapter 3

Minerva's mirror: Chapter 3

(Albus Dumbledore takes his seat at the teacher's table for breakfast. Minerva is already in hers.)

"Morning Minerva!"

"Good morning Albus. Your hair looks wonderful!"

(Albus blushes a little)

"Thank you. It must be that shampoo you bought me. My mirror said exactly the same thing."

"Well it is a wonderful shampoo. I've used it for years and my hair never seems to tire of it. It really gives it a shine and makes it ever so silky and soft. I wouldn't use anything else now."

(Albus stands up a little to get a better look at the bun on Minerva's head. Minerva frowns. Albus sits

again.)

"Do you know, I don't think I've ever actually seen your hair, Minerva?"

(Minerva blanches)

"You see it every day, Albus!"

"Yes, but what I mean is, I've never seen it down."

"No. I don't think you have…"

"Is it luxuriant?"

(Minerva is shocked by his choice of adjective.)

"Uum…well, yes it is rather fine."

"And long?"

"Yes, I can sit on in when it's down…"

(Long pause, followed by throat-clearing from Albus)

"And you've used this particular shampoo for how long?"

"About fifteen years. Ever since it came out…"

"Hmm…well, you see, the thing is…"

"Yes?"

"My mirror…"

(Albus explains the demands of his mirror.)

"Of course it seems totally unnecessary to me, but the mirror insisted…So would you mind? He's gone ever so intense all of a sudden. Used to be a very laid back chap, but this seems to have upset him. If you come, it might shut him up."

(Albus looks hopefully at Minerva, who shifts uncomfortably in her chair)

"Albus…"

"Yes?"

"Would you be very put out if I said no?"

"No! Of course not! Not at all! Not one bit! Don't be daft! Not put out at all!"

"I'm sorry…"

"Don't be! It's just a foolish mirror! Silly of me to ask. I shouldn't let myself be bullied by inanimate objects."

(small smile from Minerva and an awkward silence.)

"Any particular reason…just so I can tell the mirror…?"

(Big blush from Minerva)

"I…um…I'd rather keep it to myself, if you don't mind, Albus."

(Albus's turn to blush)

"Of course, of course…I beg your pardon."

(Much toast munching)

"Well, good morning, then Minerva."

"Good morning, Albus."

(doors close as Minerva and Albus exit the great hall in different directions.)


	4. Minerva's Mirror Chapter 4

Minerva's mirror: Chapter 4

(Minerva stands before her mirror, getting ready for bed. She un-coils her hair and looks at herself with it down.)

"It _is _lovely, dear."

"Shhh."

"Ooh, sorry."

(Minerva begins to run her fingers through her hair, closing her eyes as she does so. She moves her head from side to side as each hand glides through, pulling as far as her arms will reach. She does this for some length of time. Then suddenly she opens her eyes, pulls her hair over her shoulder and hurriedly plaits it, shaking her head.)

"What am I doing?"

"Plaiting your lovely hair, dear."

"No, I meant…never mind."

"Something on your mind?"

(pause)

"What makes you think the Headmaster's fond of me?"

"I beg your pardon?"

"This morning you said that the Headmaster is very fond of me. And that he'd like to see my hair down…How do you know?"

"Well, I hear things."

"What sort of things?"

(Minerva leans in to mirror.)

"Just things. From portraits passing through the rooms, and the like."

"And what have you heard regarding me and the Headmaster?"

"That he's very fond of you, as I said."

"What about him wanting to see my hair down?"

(Mirror pauses.)

"Well…I added that bit in myself. It's quite dull being your mirror, you know! I have to entertain myself somehow!"

"There's no need to be rude!"

"But I'm sure there's something in it. Professor Dippet says…"

"Professor Dippet?"

"Oh yes. Pops in all the time to visit your grandmother in the sitting room."

"And what does he have to say about the Headmaster and I?"

"Nothing. Just that he's very fond of you."

(Minerva eyes her mirror suspiciously and clears throat).

"As it happens, the Headmaster did indeed ask to see my hair today."

"Ah ha!"

"But not for his own benefit. For that of his mirror."

"His mirror?"

"Yes. Apparently, it doesn't like him taking advice from people who don't show their hair. It wants to check mine itself."

"Oh dear. That doesn't sound good."

"It most certainly does not. First of all, it was ridiculous of Albus to ask me at all and secondly…"

"No. I mean for the Headmaster. I happen to be well acquainted with the mirror in the Headmaster's bedroom and it's a glass not to be trifled with! We're a pair, made by the same master craftswizard and my other half was a petulant so and so from the moment he was first hung. We used to be in the same room, until we were separated for fighting. Ooh! He could be a know it all at times! In the end, our mistress had to move him out for countering all of my advice. Said the slanging matches across the room were too much. Of course, she stuck with me, she was a woman of taste…"

(Minerva snorts)

"Albus won't be bothered by a grumpy mirror."

"He will if it starts to play up. I know that mirror of old. You mark my words, it won't behave until it gets what it wants."

"Well, it's not going to get what it wants. I do not take orders from mirrors…"

(mirror whispers under breath) "Don't I know it!"

"…and there will be no taking down of my hair before a second party, and certainly not in the Headmaster's bedroom! Not unless Albus…"

"Not unless he..?

(Sigh)

"Nothing. Goodnight. Nox."

(Minerva gets into bed and slams bed curtains shut.)

* * *

I really struggled with this chapter, so I apologise for the lack of laughs. In the end I've had to knock it out as it is just to keep the story in the format I planned. It ain't up to much, I know, so I am delivering two chapters at once as a form of compensation.

And for those of you complaining of lack of detail, I'd been reading lots of plays when I started this and was interested in writing a piece in theatre-style, as it were. I found I couldn't manage without stage directions, which are in the brackets, but for the most part this fic will be based entirely on conversations.


	5. Minerva's Mirror 5

Minerva's mirror: Chapter 5

(The great hall: breakfast the following day)

"My mirror's gone on strike."

"On strike? How can it do that?"

"It keeps steaming itself up every time I go near it. Can't see a thing."

"But why on earth would it do that?"

"Said I was reckless with my hair. Said that as I was prepared to take advice from other quarters without first verifying their competency, I clearly no longer required its services. I wonder, Professor Flitwick, is my beard tidy this morning?"

"Perfect, as usual, Headmaster. But I still don't understand. Where have you been getting alternative hair-care advice?"

"From Minerva."

"Still I fail to understand…"

"Well, the mirror thinks it is inappropriate for me to take advice from her when I have never actually _seen _her hair. Down, I mean."

"I am completely confused."

"It thinks she's hiding something. Thinks she's got something wrong with her hair."

"But surely she only wears it up for practical reasons?"

"Well that's what I thought. But when I asked her to come and prove it to the mirror, she refused."

"Perhaps she thinks it's all nonsense."

"Well, of course it is! But I don't think it was that which stopped her. She seemed more embarrassed than annoyed. Wouldn't give me an explanation as to why not either."

"Very strange!"

"Indeed!"

(Toast munched meditatively)

"Have _you _ever seen her with her hair down, Filius?"

"Don't think I ever have, Albus."

"Me neither. Not in all the years I've known her. I wonder why she won't show the mirror."

"Perhaps there _is _something wrong with it."

"Nonsense!"

"Well, perhaps she dyed it irreversibly once and she wears it up to hide the mistake."

(Pause)

"You don't have much hair, do you Filius?"

"Not much, as you see."

"Hmm. I don't think your theory holds out, then."

"No?"

"No. And I do not believe that there is anything wrong with Minerva's hair. But I must confess that I find it a pretty little mystery, and I am determined to get to the bottom of it."

(Flitwick emits squeak)

"I think you should steer well clear of Minerva McGonagall's bottom, Headmaster! Unless you want to be transfigured again into that rather nasty…"

"Thank you Filius! I don't need reminding. But have no fear. I am not interested in Minerva's bottom. Only her head."

"Jolly good, Headmaster. But I'm not certain that messing with her head is any safer than messing with her..."

"Good morning Filius!"

(Albus quickly exits the Great Hall via the side door, slamming it behind him.)


End file.
